Monday, November 7, 2011

Celebrating "lasts"

It has been a pretty unique and special feeling knowing that I am in the last round of chemo. There are so many things that I am bidding adieu to these days. That feels amazing, and actually a bit surreal. This past Friday was 6 months from the day I got the news and my world changed. It seems extra special then that it was also the last hurrah for chemo.

When they unhooked me from my infusion last week, it was a wonderful feeling. With each day that passes, I get further from my 22 guage needles, paper tape, and bags of iv's. I get further from my side effects and fatigue. Hopefully, I get further from my fear.

I am happy to say that I no longer will have the super fatigue days known as "chemo sundays". I am so happy that I will no longer feel winded doing the most minor tasks. I am looking forward to finishing up the joint pain. I am so happy to have a normal stomach again. I am so happy to be looking forward to a bright future, and to no longer have to count down anything. To know that each side effect is only bubbling up for the last time is truly amazing. I think the most special feeling will be in two weeks when it's the first "non-chemo" weekend. Life will feel grand then.

Yesterday, we celebrated Steven's birthday with our family and friends. It reminded me of how blessed I am. I have a wonderful support group, and I am excited to be heading in a healthy direction to be able to enjoy life's celebrations with all of them.

I feel like I missed so much in the past 6 months, but I know that what I have gained is infinitely greater. I know that this chapter was a dark one in many ways, but also a rich one, full of opportunity.

Now it's time to look forward. Time to focus on rebuilding my future, and my life. Time to reclaim my body that has been on loan to science for a nasty experiment for the past 6 months. Time to start feeling like me again. And time to do my best to ensure that my body and mind are strong for a long, healthy future.

No comments:

Post a Comment